What can sailors learn from dogs?
Thu Nov 30 2023
I often wonder who is the smarter race, humans or dogs? I’m sure most people would immediately proclaim it to be humans after all we invented electricity, flew someone to the moon and brought them back again (although that looks like it was a bit of a one hit wonder now. I can recall being at my first school and crowding around the television to watch that happen, and that was well over 50 years ago. So you can understand why the conspiracy theories might have grown. Was it really just filmed in some Hollywood studio? It’s often repeated that we have more technology now in an electric toaster than was used to steer the rocket to the moon and back again. I know that to be true, I can recall that my mum’s car didn’t even have self cancelling indicators. I mean, come on, who’s kidding who here? And if we really are so clever now and know so much about technology now why haven’t we done it again? Why haven’t we built a few housing estates and shopping Mall’s up there and given the whole place to Donald Trump and his band of merry followers? Award them a Kingdom where he can be King and his loyal servants worship him. After all, they wouldn’t need a great deal. About 10 McDonald’s and limitless internet and they’d be as happy as ducks.)
But dogs are smart too. I’m not talking about the type of dog that goes to dog shows and tears around a playground full of equipment whilst their rather smartly dressed owner holds out a treat at arms length and the dog follows them obediently around the track. Can you just imagine them at home? The dog would be up on the worktop one minute, then diving through the cat flap before leaping back in through an open window onto the lap of the owner who has only just that minute sat down for a cup of tea. No, I’m thinking about how dogs organise themselves and ultimately their owners.
Firstly, they love routine. And routine is essential for sailors. There are so many essential tasks in a boat that routines have to be formed to ensure the safety and efficiency of the vessel. Essential tasks include, watch keeping, maintaining the log, inspecting the ship for wear and tear, obtaining weather forecasts, passage planning and so on and so on.
Secondly, dogs are really good at taking a nap when there is nothing else to do, (and quite often when there is plenty to do). You’ll watch the dog wander around, sniffing a few things and pretending to look busy when in reality they’ve simply got their eye on their dog bed and they are looking for a quick way to get in it. As sailors on a long distance cruise like this it’s really important to take plenty of naps as the opportunity arises. Sleep is so important in maintaining all the bodies functions that every opportunity should be taken the moment it arises.
Another thing you’ll notice about a dog is that when an ‘alarm’ goes off, like the postman poking another unwanted catalogue through the letterbox, the dog can literally elevate itself from its bed, get all four legs going flat out before they’ve touched the floor, and then bark it’s head off as it runs full tilt towards the front door. All of this happens in a nano-second no matter what time of the day or night. It’s flight mode is superb and when seemingly deep in slumber it has all systems on standby ready to respond in a heartbeat. That’s quite different from me for although I set my alarm for 10 mins before my watch is due to begin I need every one on of those precious minutes to get my ancient frame to function. First task is often to peel my tongue away from the roof of my mouth as during my sleep it appears to have completely dried up and somehow got stuck in a very odd place. Like Velcro being pulled apart it slowly separates itself but now it has a similar texture to wood and it takes a few moments to soften it up and return to its normal position. Next is the eyelids. One at a time they have to be manually prised open like peeling the foil lid off a new container of mayonnaise. Some rubbing is necessary to encourage the blood to flow and within a few minutes basic, if somewhat blurry sight is achieved. Stomach muscles have, by now, been given a few minutes notice and with some resistance and under some considerable duress they attempt to engage and lift my sleepy frame from its pit. We’re almost there now as the whole carcass eases itself onto its legs and a slow shuffle out of the cabin begins. Next stop the kettle and hunt for a tea bag before any attempt at service can be performed. In total contrast to the dog who has the ability to sleep deeply and soundly yet respond in seconds when the need arises.
Perhaps the dogs finest attribute is unconditional love. How it can be shut indoors all day or left in the car whilst you go and watch a film yet upon your return you become its very best friend. It simply cannot wait to see you despite you leaving it cooped up for hours on end. Now being on a small boat for any period of time can challenge even the most robust of relationships. A combination of tiredness, sometimes hunger, frustration and any number of other catalysts can bring tempers to boiling point and the temptation to want to murder one’s shipmate can easily arise. And when tempers get to these levels ugly scenes occur. Furthermore, the mood lingers. A bad atmosphere swirls around the boat as crew members attempt to go about their day without crossing paths with their assailant. Dogs would have none of that. They don’t even know how to get cross or take offence. In fact if a dog has a bone or a toy and you childishly confiscate it in some weak attempt to show your superiority over the dog, the dog just thinks it’s a game. It can happily occupy itself searching for the toy and is quietly delighted that you’ve taken the time to interact. After a while it may well turn in and snooze for an hour or two but when it wakes, there’s no grudge, no sulking, but the tail is going full tilt as you shuffle down the stairs in your pyjamas and the hairy thing couldn’t be more delighted to see you. We can all learn from that.
My money is on dogs as the smarter being. I mean if a spaceship landed just outside your back door tomorrow night and some one eyed, two fingered creature came up to you and said ‘take me to whoever is in charge’. Upon which you reply ‘but I’m in charge!’ The creature furrows its mono brow and says ‘but you can’t be. You’re picking up dog poo. I need to talk to him’ pointing at the dog.
Perhaps dogs are not only man’s best friend but also man’s greatest teacher?